SpankzPimpJuice
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guys on LG.com why?why would guys even consider being on this site. i mean how can they relate 2 being gay. and threw wha we go threw in a gay community? last thing we need is 4 guys 2 start smack talkin on a site clearly stating its 4 Lesbians. as long as the ladies in the fam dont get disrespected by guys... i guess its kool... even tho its not fair for them 2 ruin an all ladiez website... what do you ladies think? and 2 think it would be only lesbians on here...
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marcipants
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Personally, I don't really like exclusion of any kind, but I think anyone signing up to an all women (especially all lesbian) site has to have a clear understanding what the community is about and know that if they cross any lines or come here just to be assholes will get the boot.
But that said, I'm not a moderator and I don't actually have to deal with any of the potential bullshit, so I am supportive of whatever the community decides.
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teh spikey
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I agree with marci, exclusion isnt the answer, and implimenting anything of the sort would only give rise to resentment..
Anyone signing up would have to realise the levels of accepted behavior. Those that cause trouble would get a swift kick and ban from Admin, i'm sure.
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admin
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Hi guys,
just to clarify our standing on this with regards to guys joining. In an ideal world it would be all lesbians who join the forums and participate on a regular basis. However, it is completely unfair to discriminate against anyone on the basis of gender or sexuality. As much as we would like things to be a fully lesbian affair and we may not fully understand why guys would want to join (as we probably wouldn't want to join a straight male group if we had the choice between the two), it isn't up to us to judge. We have been happy with the contribution from our two male members that we know of. Both have contributed a lot to interesting and polite discussion.
Anybody that is acting out regardless of gender / sexuality will get a warning as we want everyone here to feel safe and happy. Obviously anyone joining for the sole purpose of causing problems will be dealt with as swiftly as we can. Also anyone feeling victimized in any way, please let us know about it via PM and we'll look into it.
Hope that helps clear things up a little.
Basically we just want a happy, safe, fun place for lesbian gamers. 
On a side note, we do want this space to be a mainly lesbian affair, so if you have a website, a blog or anything of that nature that lesbians are likely to look at, PLEASE add a link to us--visibility is key. Thanks.
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nekotine
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indeed, i have no issues with guys joining the site/forums so long as they don't make waves. i have quite a few guy friend, straight and gay, who are totally awesome. heck, one of them is more of a militant feminist than -I- am. XD but yeah, i'm sure if some guys do come in to start trouble, i trust the admin and mods will sweep in valkyrie style and properly dispose of their existence on the site. :3
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SpankzPimpJuice
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i actually have been puttin word of mouth to other lesbians related sites about.checking out LG.com.. oh n thx for everyones opinionz on this matter...
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minit
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What the admin said..
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SpankzPimpJuice
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| minit wrote: |
What the admin said.. |
what about it? the conversation been past done b4 admin stated ne thing... did i miss some thing?
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teh spikey
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| SpankzPimpJuice wrote: | | minit wrote: |
What the admin said.. |
what about it? the conversation been past done b4 admin stated ne thing... did i miss some thing? |
I think she's agreeing with Admin, using the expression "what she said" as a way to express agreement on a level to imply that she would say exactly the same thing.
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SpankzPimpJuice
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commonly stated without knowlege of self expression... how hard can it be 2 express how one feel?
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minit
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| teh spikey wrote: | | SpankzPimpJuice wrote: | | minit wrote: |
What the admin said.. |
what about it? the conversation been past done b4 admin stated ne thing... did i miss some thing? |
I think she's agreeing with Admin, using the expression "what she said" as a way to express agreement on a level to imply that she would say exactly the same thing. |
Yes teh spikey! It is way to say that you agree with someone in a forum. It crossed my mind this morning when I woke up that it might not be considered a contribution to the thread my some.
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minit
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| SpankzPimpJuice wrote: | | commonly stated without knowlege of self expression... how hard can it be 2 express how one feel? |
Sometimes it is hard to express yourself for reasons unknown to others. Yet I apologize if it seemed like I glossed over the discussion in this thread.
I think I understand what you are talking about SpankzPimpJuice in your initial post, and I agree. When guys get involved much of the time it ends up getting overrun by disrespect and "smack talkin". I especially dislike jokes that are not funny which degrade women and all the anti-female swearing. Or, the guys push to the front and all the women go into the background. You are left then to constantly fight being overwhelmed in one way or another. You have to fight to be heard, fight just to be understood. Which of course is why lesbians need their own safe places.
At the same time, I am agreeing with the admin (and others) when she says that we really cannot discriminate on the basis of sexuality or gender. It is not discrimination to talk about behavior that would be acceptable or unacceptable here, and it is one of those things you know when you see it.
I agree with her when the admin said, "Anybody that is acting out regardless of gender / sexuality will get a warning as we want everyone here to feel safe and happy. Obviously anyone joining for the sole purpose of causing problems will be dealt with as swiftly as we can. Also anyone feeling victimized in any way, please let us know about it via PM and we'll look into it."
I think that any males who want to participate and learn with us should be allowed to do so as long as they are being sincere and respectful. These are actually the males we want around.
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SpankzPimpJuice
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thanx you 4 sharing your thoughts... i appreciate well spoken out post... because apparently sum people are blind and sees what they only want 2 see in my statements which had ppl misunderstood my 1st statement which did stated if guyz were reely kool i believe they can b around if every1 is kool with them...
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Margali
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I wish we could discriminate.
Heaven knows we as women are discrimnated against in a thousand different ways everyday. As lesbians even more so. The very foundations of our society and culture are based upon patriarchal values and assumptions so deeply ingrained that they usually pass unnoticed even by the women oppressed by them.
I'm not talking about discrimination formally encoded into the laws of the land, although that too, still exists. But, rather, the subtle forms of misogyny inherent in our customs and traditions. Assumptions and stereotypes we've all grown up with and generaly take for granted. So much so, that we rarely take the time to really think about their misogynistic roots.
So, yes, I wish we could discriminate. I wish we could have a 100% women's space here. But the reality of the internet makes that impossible. So be it. We'll do as women have always done; Make the best of what we've got and hope men don't come along and screw it up.
Let me just add: I don't hate men. I struggle everyday to keep hate of any kind out of my heart, (Although the current administration makes that harder all the time) I think men are just as much victims of patriarchal culture as women. I know, respect, and count as friends, many fine men. But the fact is, they are the ruling class and as such they gain the most of society's benifits. There are plenty of places for them to go if they wish to avoid the company of women. I don't think it's to much to ask for women to have a few places of our own.
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SpankzPimpJuice
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Wow margali... wow lol... u left me speechless. thanx 4 sharing a piece of ur mind... thanx u
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teh spikey
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| Margali wrote: | Heaven knows we as women are discrimnated against in a thousand different ways everyday. As lesbians even more so. The very foundations of our society and culture are based upon patriarchal values and assumptions so deeply ingrained that they usually pass unnoticed even by the women oppressed by them.
I'm not talking about discrimination formally encoded into the laws of the land, although that too, still exists. But, rather, the subtle forms of misogyny inherent in our customs and traditions. Assumptions and stereotypes we've all grown up with and generaly take for granted. So much so, that we rarely take the time to really think about their misogynistic roots. |
I understand where you're coming from Margali, and i share your frustration.
However, I firmly believe that to answer such discrimination with the same discrimination reversed, however small the setting, does not help the issue. If anything, it only exacerbates it, as each side further discriminates against the other, tit for tat, etc etc.
"An eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind" is as true an adage today as it ever was. Someone has to be the better person, and leave any and all discrimination behind them.
My $0.02
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SpankzPimpJuice
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2 think a convo. was 2 be over... apparently some cant let it go... theres no real evidence of discrimination here... and its been clearly stated of cons and pros both who were kool here or not... if 2 think its not then Man up or Woman up... this is gettin ridiculous lol... 2 anyone who has something new 2 say topic related please feel free 2 express ur self...
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sasune
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Personally I do have issues with "straight men" always crashing in and I'm sick to death of it...Make an all woman guild and watch a herd of them try to join on female alts to try to get some lesbian cyber.
Its no secret what they are up to and I'm not one to candy coat it. They (straight men) are not like us and I don't fool myself into thinking that they are.
Lets make this crystal for them shall we?...you wont see hawt lesbian cyber in these forums. You wont see some secret meeting site for hawt lesbian cyber.
All the charm and playing nice guy won't turn a real lesbian, we are the women that don't need a man to feel complete and I for one am greatful for that. Still wanna hang around?
As for gay men...I don't have an issue with them because they are not trying to run down every female they meet in order to cyber.
If it was my forums I would kick them to the curb in a heartbeat...there is a sign on the door and it says "Lesbian gamers".
Now ask yourself, what were they thinking when they decided to join a forum called lesbian gamer? I know exactly what they were thinking and I'm sure most of you do as well.
There was a reason that japan had to make certain railcars for womens use only and Italy to make a section of beach for women only.( both events were covered in world news just this year btw)
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SpankzPimpJuice
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hmm interestin... thank u for piece of your mind... well i wish i can attend them all ladies locations. lol i dont know why all Ladies section dont Xsist in Florida beaches.
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Critical.Hurt
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what a weird thread :!
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masteroftheclaw
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| Critical.Hurt wrote: | | what a weird thread :! |
Haha just a little bit.
But, guys on lesbiangamers.com is fine. Why not? Unless they're going to just sign up to leave spammy spam messages or taunt the girls here...
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TLC DEMON
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hey we get pissed when people make fun of us on xbox live. so lets be the better people and not piss them off.
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Critical.Hurt
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i personally find this whole "story" sad and disappointing
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minit
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| Critical.Hurt wrote: | | i personally find this whole "story" sad and disappointing |
Hi! Are you saying that the thread subject is sad and disappointing?
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C4bl3Fl4m3
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My 2 centsI wrote about this in a different thread, so I'll just copy and paste it here.
| Quote: | Sierra wrote:
Now hold on a minute. My point was more that people here don't want this space to be flooded with gay guys. I have that on the good authority of people telling me that at one point. And that makes sense, as this is a Lesbian space. (Duh.) There are many people who don't care one way or another, but some do, and I think we can do the courtesy of being out of the way for the most part. It's not a matter of exclusion, it's trying to maintain a safe space. |
I thought this was a space for ALL girls who liked girls, not just lesbians. Lesbian is just one term. Other women who like women might be bisexual or choose other labels, like dyke, queer, gay girl, or same-gender loving.
And what about transmen who feel they belong in the women's community because of years of involvement in it pre-transition? And other genderqueers who don't feel comfortable just calling themselves lesbians? I'm a bisexual biofemale who is gender fluid. Does this mean I'm not welcome?
I understand if you want to fight spam, but I think that anyone who wishes to have a good discussion about girls who like girls + gaming should be welcome here.
And as for "safe space", I feel much safer in spaces where I know that diversity and difference is welcomed, rather than in spaces where people are expected to toe a certain line, whether it be their gender, sexual orienation, ideals, politics, or whatever.
Just my 2 cents.
***
About my thoughts on the topic of this post.
Honestly, I think the more people we can expose to our queer culture, the greater understanding people will have. And the more understanding, the better. (One of the characters in Dykes To Watch Out For said something like this to Mo in regards to her complaining about non-lesbians [a bisexual in specific in this comic] coming in to the dyke bookstore and "soaking up" lesbian culture.)
So if guys and others want to come here and learn about what it is to be a queer woman/female gamer, I say, we welcome them. As long as noone's being a dick or harassing us (which is different from simply disagreeing), I don't care about the gender behind the keyboard.
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hanna
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I'm all for "diversity" and being open to other people...
BUT
I would also like to have a space just for girls like me.
There are plenty of other sites for all kinds of mingling and exposing our culture or whatnot..
How many other lesbian gaming sites do you know of?
I know it might sound bad.. I swear Im not a man hater or anything of the sort
Is it so bad to only want gay girls on a gay girl site?
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katiegeek23
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One thing I've learned from my former interest in being a queer activist is that the more people are familiar with us as individuals as well as a fun group to hang out with, the more they're likely to come to the eventual realization that we are just as human as they are.
| TLC DEMON wrote: | | hey we get pissed when people make fun of us on xbox live. so lets be the better people and not piss them off. |
Which pretty much sums up my feelings.
Building on what C4bl3Fl4m3 said, I identify as queer and not specifically lesbian, although most of my relationships have been with women. In addition, I'm a transwomen but I don't identify as trans per se although I'm quite aware of the reality of my situation. I sure hope that y'all are okay with having me here because I really like this site and forum so far.
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SpankzPimpJuice
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lmaoi guess i was wrong when i thought this topic was overly done..then 2 think tha subject wasnt as strong due 2 lack evidence proof of discrimination..n 2 think all angles of convo has already been spoken..im still suprised anyone can remain hurt in any way threw this topic..but 2 those case sensitive shouldnt read this trend..it wasnt meant 2 harm anyone..y cry about expressions express threw everyones opinions?2 all of u who may still be bum out,life goes on,we were only sharing piece of mind.geez
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minit
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I support bi people and trans-gender people too and when I think of all of us as a big group, I call us queer. I am lesbian. I think that I have alot to learn still about trans issues, and I look forward to that actually.
It's a good thing to share our thoughts on this. Right SpankzPimpJuice! This is a debate that has been going on for years, so we probably won't solve it today.
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katiegeek23
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I don't mind having guys on LG.com as long as they're respectful and all. I guess my point in outing myself is that so many varieties of women fall under the "women who love other women" category and that we're not always going to agree with everybody else, yanno?
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SpankzPimpJuice
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| katiegeek23 wrote: | | I don't mind having guys on LG.com as long as they're respectful and all. I guess my point in outing myself is that so many varieties of women fall under the "women who love other women" category and that we're not always going to agree with everybody else, yanno? |
thats my point i just wanted us all 2 just gather and express and understand each of our point of view... this isnt a discrimination topic... only those who like 2 twist a topic 4rm good 2 worse gets 2 my edge
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minit
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| katiegeek23 wrote: | | I don't mind having guys on LG.com as long as they're respectful and all. I guess my point in outing myself is that so many varieties of women fall under the "women who love other women" category and that we're not always going to agree with everybody else, yanno? |
Yes I do know!
Well, the respect piece is truly important to me.
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