NightSky
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Why do gay girls do this?So I go to a community college and on my backpack is a rainbow flag. Well, I certainly know girls look because of it but why do they just look? Are they expecting me to come up and start a conversation with them like a man? I mean, I'd like to have out gay friends (I've met girls that are bi but they're not very open about it). I figure I took the first step by just putting it out there but girls really don't do much except catch a glimpse. Sometimes I wish everyone who was gay wore a sticker or something. lol Oh yes, on top of that girls seem to only be interested in dating. Why can't we just be friends? ... omg, that sounds like a break up line. haha Anyways, I'm starting to really think they expect me to come up to them. I dunno. So you guys are gay girls so tell me what's going on in your head?! And I'm studying psychology lofl
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Vickie
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Lol well, for me I'm a rather shy and introverted person (don't let my online personality fool you). Introverts usually like to observe from afar before they make their move -- if they even make a move. I'm starting to think I should wear a sticker as well, though. I'm apparently not giving out enough "lesbian vibe".
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NightSky
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"Introverts usually like to observe from afar before they make their move -- if they even make a move."
Yea, basically I don't think they will aside from the more bolder ones which, from my experience, are far and between. I don't have a problem starting conversations with strangers at all. I do it every single day of my life. But they got the opening, ya know? *sigh* Women. lol
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Babycha
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I'm pretty introverted myself, and on top of that, I don't like talking to random people. If we were in the same class and somehow started talking, cool. I definitely wouldn't talk to someone just because they had a rainbow sticker or something. If someone had a sticker for a band I like, or a comic or something I miiiiight say "oh hey, you like them? me too"
But like I said, I'm pretty shy/anti social... 
Fortunately, I have 2 friends IRL and they're lesbians. Yay 
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lacrossegirlie
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i've had some experinces where girls have had rainbows on bags and such and are not gay, but i was lucky and found that out without trying a "so....your gay" line to start a conversation 
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Nimbo
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| Quote: | | i've had some experinces where girls have had rainbows on bags and such and are not gay, but i was lucky and found that out without trying a "so....your gay" line to start a conversation |
Awesome way to start a conversation xD
Honestly i wouldn't talk with a chick just cause she had a rainbow sticker, i would have to have something in common with her so there wouldn't be an abundance of ackward silences xD
My way of approaching someone is kinda stupid, i usually try with a lame joke or question like " Do ya know if sheep gains weight when it rains?" and if she laughs i'll continue talking ^^
It all depends on the person, not everybody can go and talk to a complete stranger-which i can totally understand(gotta watch out for those axe killers)- so sometimes you have to make the first move and other times she does, it's all about the persons involved.
We have to make up like a sign or secret handshake so that we can find other gay people, i vote that NightSky should come up with one =p
| Quote: | | lol Oh yes, on top of that girls seem to only be interested in dating. Why can't we just be friends? |
Maybe you're just awesome dating materiale? *wink wink nudge nudge*
And i don't think all rainbows are gay- not to burst ya bubble =p
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Vickie
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| Nimbo wrote: | | Honestly i wouldn't talk with a chick just cause she had a rainbow sticker, i would have to have something in common with her so there wouldn't be an abundance of ackward silences xD |
The rainbow sticker is supposed to be the thing in common. 
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Nimbo
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| Quote: | | Honestly i wouldn't talk with a chick just cause she had a rainbow sticker, i would have to have something in common with her so there wouldn't be an abundance of ackward silences xD |
| Quote: | | The rainbow sticker is supposed to be the thing in common. |
Lol, i know that but not everybody knows that we called dibs on the rainbow and i don't wanna come of as a complete ass going "Ah zee ya have a rainbow sticker, wanna have hot girl secks with meh?"
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Frances
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Yeah the rainbow doesnt always work....
My bro bought an old hillman (funky little blue car circa...old) and my dad whacked a rainbow sticker on it saying "thats what they all had back in the day"
....my bro discretly removed it later, dad was totally oblivious to the meaning lol
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lacrossegirlie
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ahhh people not getting it.
i once watched as a girl (when i was still going to college) with rainbow ribbons on her bag get some comments. some simply about the rainbows, she turned to me baffled and said you utahns are really friendly around here! completly missing the not only rainbow button i had but the fact it was rainbow and said 'i used to be a tomboy but then i grew-up and became a full fledged lesbian!'
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NightSky
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"Maybe you're just awesome dating materiale? *wink wink nudge nudge* "
lol Well, to be quite honest, a lot of girls check me out... more than once. Particularly in class. It doesn't bother me. I just wish they would say something. Come talk! Let's hang out and be friends. Do something! lol Those are the people I know for sure are gay. Otherwise, I'm a bit clueless with girls in my school. The majority are quite feminine.
OK EVERYONE LISTEN UP!!!
Here's the secret handshake...
up, down, side to side, sway of the hand and a wink. lol
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Nimbo
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*mutters to herself* up, down, side to side, sway of the hand and a wink... Okay now i'm of to practice that on ten bananas before trying it on a poor unsuspecting girl xD
| Quote: | | lol Well, to be quite honest, a lot of girls check me out... more than once. |
and you're modest to boot, see you're the complete package =p
If it is any help i would totally talk to you in real life, just be prepared for a lot of jokes xD
| Quote: | | Otherwise, I'm a bit clueless with girls in my school. The majority are quite feminine. |
You could make a questionare and give it out to all girls, and make the questions uber gay-"do you like mullets?" gawd no i'm kidding.
Anyways, my theory is that a lot of people hate making the first move-they don't want to be vulnerable or be rejected and instead of talking to someone that they're interested in they linger, not sure if it is worth the risk, and some people are just not used to making the first move, so they think a coy smile is all the other person need to strike up a conversation..
Wow.. i wrote all that without getting sidetracked, ah need a cookie!
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Kat_Edw
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| Nimbo wrote: |
| Quote: | | lol Well, to be quite honest, a lot of girls check me out... more than once. |
and you're modest to boot, see you're the complete package =p
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I just almost choked on my monster munch i laughed so hard then.
I totally agree. No girl approaches me ever. I dont know if its coz im butt ugly or my complete and utter lack of social awareness  Ive been told...a lot..that i dont look gay though. BUMMER MY FRIEND. Ill have to learn the handshake.
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Nimbo
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| Quote: | | Ive been told...a lot..that i dont look gay though |
Well my friend time to break out the flannel shirts and get a new haircut(a mullet) and only talk about indigo girls and that you hate men, then noone will ever doubt your gayness.
Did i cover every stereotype or did i miss some?
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NightSky
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| Nimbo wrote: | *mutters to herself* up, down, side to side, sway of the hand and a wink... Okay now i'm of to practice that on ten bananas before trying it on a poor unsuspecting girl xD
| Quote: | | lol Well, to be quite honest, a lot of girls check me out... more than once. |
and you're modest to boot, see you're the complete package =p
If it is any help i would totally talk to you in real life, just be prepared for a lot of jokes xD
| Quote: | | Otherwise, I'm a bit clueless with girls in my school. The majority are quite feminine. |
You could make a questionare and give it out to all girls, and make the questions uber gay-"do you like mullets?" gawd no i'm kidding.
Anyways, my theory is that a lot of people hate making the first move-they don't want to be vulnerable or be rejected and instead of talking to someone that they're interested in they linger, not sure if it is worth the risk, and some people are just not used to making the first move, so they think a coy smile is all the other person need to strike up a conversation..
Wow.. i wrote all that without getting sidetracked, ah need a cookie! |
lol A bit of confidence never killed anyone.  In fact, I think everyone could use a little dose of it. And you sound cool and funny. I bet we'd get on well. I love joking around too.
As for the other part, yeah, I totally agree with you on that. So in essence, they are expecting me to play the "man" role... eww, can't stand the thought of being a man. lol I love being a woman. Anyways, I guess it's up to me to spark the conversation. I've done it a few times and it's worked out well.
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Nimbo
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| Quote: | | And you sound cool and funny. I bet we'd get on well. |
Wow.. ya know flattery well get you anywhere
| Quote: | | As for the other part, yeah, I totally agree with you on that. So in essence, they are expecting me to play the "man" role... eww, can't stand the thought of being a man. lol I love being a woman. Anyways, I guess it's up to me to spark the conversation. I've done it a few times and it's worked out well. |
I think the essence of the problem is that a lot of people are still stuck in old gender roles( even if they won't admit it), like you said about being the "man" - I think that's a completely wrong way of looking at it, i mean we as lesbians and even straight people should be above those roles but somehow we always end up reinforcing them, or smacking labels on eachother(so not cool.)
But i guess it's because we need to use terms we're familiar with to explain who does what in the relationship.
Did that make any sense? It did when i was thinking i xD
I suck at making the first move, but it doesn't stop me from trying =p
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Kat_Edw
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| Nimbo wrote: |
I suck at making the first move, but it doesn't stop me from trying =p |
Story of my life that there.
its just confidence right? Not a sex gender thing. Girls dont wanna get thought of as a pushy manwoman OR heaven forbid shes not actually gay so they dont aproach people. If u have high confidence u dont give a crap if what they make of you, its just you. And with that i suddenly feel a little less confident lol.
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Thefremen
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| Kat_Edw wrote: | | Nimbo wrote: |
I suck at making the first move, but it doesn't stop me from trying =p |
Story of my life that there.
its just confidence right? Not a sex gender thing. Girls dont wanna get thought of as a pushy manwoman OR heaven forbid shes not actually gay so they dont aproach people. If u have high confidence u dont give a crap if what they make of you, its just you. And with that i suddenly feel a little less confident lol. |
Yeah low confidence/self-esteem issues are universal. I know that's always been a huge issue with me.
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Nimbo
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d'aww, it seems like everybody on this forum needs a confidence boost.
YOU'RE ALL HOT, SMART AND AWESOME, IF ANYBODY SAYS OTHERWISE THEY*RE A BUNCH OF BUTTFACES...
yeah, i wonder if that helped =)
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Kat_Edw
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LOLLL oh god. Welllll that certainly helped. I can live in satisfaction knowing theyre all buttfaces.
Does anyone else have the problem where your friends are actually your biggest downfall? My friends ALWAYS make me look like the straightest person alive. Specially my guy friends. Always seems when a girl looks at me im conveniently linking arms with a guy friend or some other stupid friend stuff.
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nekotine
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Yeah, like lacrosse said, just because you have a rainbow something on, doesn't necessarily make you part of the LGBT family. In fact, quite a few people I know that are LGBT don't rock any rainbow or the like at all.
Soooooo yeah, it comes back down to the whole initiating conversation thing... ^^; And like everyone else has been saying, confidence levels differ from person to person buuuuuut have you done any non-verbal encouragements to the gals checking you out? Sometimes a simple smile and/or nod is enough of an icebreaker to get full conversations going. First step is always acknowledgement in some fashion so eye contact with a smile is a good start. If they don't take it from there, I guess it's up to you whether or not you want to pursue the matter further. While it is nice to be approached, a lot of the time, people are thinking the same thing so it's not always bad to be the one that dives in first.
All else fails...GO GO LIQUID COURAGE! LOL!
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Vickie
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| nekotine wrote: | | And like everyone else has been saying, confidence levels differ from person to person buuuuuut have you done any non-verbal encouragements to the gals checking you out? |
Well, you see, I automatically think that everyone who's "checking me out" is just judging me no matter how much I try to convince myself otherwise. I KNOW most people are too self-absorbed to be bothered judging others, but... the brain is a strange thing. :S
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Meeks
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Gotta agree with vickie here D: I'm exactly the same..I constantly feel I'm being judged instead of checked out..
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